Wait - wine comes in two flavours?
It does here in China … real and fake. Everyone should have a taste of fake, it’s quite an education …
The Chinese of course have faked everything throughout their history. The one I loved most was a report we had on our English news programme just after I first arrived here to work for the local TV Station; the headline as translated by my Chinese colleague read, “Fake toilet-paper manufacturer cracked” …
Have fun with that one, friends 
Mark
If you want a wine turpentine substitute you can always try a nice Mad Dog 20/20 or Wild Irish Rose.
Both come with convenient screw top access and can be purchased with the spare change in one’s pocket.
Guaranteed gut grenade and will almost certainly give birth to a “murder me” headache.
LOL! :mrgreen:
And I’m with Amber. I prefer a good red wine, dark chocolate, and strong coffee. I don’t think it’s a male-female thing.
How it all fits in with preferences for Macintosh computers and Saturn cars, I’m really not sure. 
1- Left. More comfortable lying on my left side, facing my better half. (Half?)
2- Whichever way it slides on the roll when I put a new one on.
3- Beer on a summer afternoon, Irish late in the evening, and with supper, a red wine (current favorite: a carmenere from Chile).
4- Migod, are those the only two possibilities?
5- 70/30 owl/lark
6- Depends on which technology. I can clear a woodlot or produce a TV documentary or build a house, but never had any reason to learn (among others) computer programming. To the friend (a compsci professor) who urged it on me, I cited early automobile years, when it made sense for a car owner to know how to make repairs; today, repairs are more complex and are required less often, so it is not practical for most owners to bother learning to make them. The same, I argued, would happen with computers. As far as I can see, it has.
7- Hands on.
8- See #4 above.
9- She is significantly younger. Almost everyone is, everyone I spend time with. People my age tend to be boring, as I no doubt seem to many of them.
10- Two oxymorons render that question essentially meaningless.
(1) UK driver’s side. This is the first time since I was a child with bronchitis that I have pretended my bed is a car.
(2) Over.
(3) Wine. A bone-dry Sauv Blanc for everyday swigging, or a rich red if the food warrants it. Can’t stand nondescript white wines, but I like a wide range of reds. I also quite like dry, strong cider, as long as it is straight from the fridge. And I like whiskey/whisky, and am very fond of gin and tonic (although I haven’t had one for a long time). I drink Baileys at Christmas, but would be horrified and disgusted at even the thought of it the rest of the year. I like port with cheese, and I made a rather lovely rum punch a couple of weeks ago. Which makes me sound like an undiscriminating old soak, so in my defence I offer the fact that I don’t like beer.
(4) Feet under.
(5) I used to be a definite night owl and not a morning person, but now I can’t stay up late either. So I don’t know what I am. Maybe a noon person, if there is such a thing?
(6) Technically savvy enough to do the things I need to do, or at least to find out how to do them. I delegate truly geeky tasks to the very techy man I married in anticipation of needing computer hardware support in later life. He isn’t allowed to meddle with my kitchen appliances, though, because his fallback approach to problem-solving is the application of brute force, and he breaks things.
(7) As a former technical author, I know I ought to say that I follow written directions better, but I only refer to manuals if all else has failed. If they are supplied, I do flick through them to look at the layout and style, and the usefulness of the contents and index pages, but that has got nothing to do with the learning process.
(8) From that choice, it would have to be romantic comedies. I don’t like anything with physical or verbal violence, I don’t like scary things, and I don’t like films that dwell on depressing things. Certificate-15 is about my limit, and even then I need someone to check that the film is suitable for me.
(9) Older. By less than a year.
(10) Hmmm. An interesting one. I suspect that I write more if I am organised, but it takes such a lot of effort for me to be organised that I tend to stick to the chaos thing, except at the beginning and end of a project. During the course of a project, I gradually drown in books and paper, but within the writing itself, I am very organised (which is why I like Scrivener because it gives me a virtual organisation that I struggle to achieve in real life).
No wonder her kids are all on probation 
(1) left
(2) Huh? Have no idea what you’re talking about
(3) Water, Armagnac (or Whisky, money’s short), tea
(4) feet under
(5) Night owl
(6) Technically savvy
(7) hands on
(8) neither. I’d also vote for sci-fi, but there a so many bad ones in circulation…
(9)whaddaya mean, ‘better’?
(10) both…more fun this way
All? All? I only have two children (that I can remember, at any rate), so your accusation seems exaggerated.
Actually, I’m drinking Pernod this evening. Which is not totally unlike absinthe. I haven’t cut off one of my ears yet so I suspect my sanity is still intact but, even so, it may just be a matter of time before the probation officer comes a-calling to make his introductions.
Quoting myself (a thing we all do) from a week ago…
… leading inexorably to:
http://www.slowpokecomics.com/strips/kindle.html
ps
(1) driver’s side - but UK roads (ie, I sleep on the left). That’s because it’s the closest side to the door and therefore the kids.
(2) OVER! It’s got to be over. I change other people’s toilet paper if it’s under.
(3) Wine, but not cheap plonk.
(4) Both, but feet under first. After reading for a while I’ll have swivelled about and legs will be akimbo
(5) More Night owl. 8am counts as being a morning person doesn’t it? 6am shoudn’t be classed as morning.
(6) Technically savvy?
(7) I follow written directions if they are well written.
(8)At age 15 - it was horror movies all the way. Now they scare me and I need to watch romantic comedies.
(9) younger
(10) I resemble this remark. I think I’d work better if I WAS organised.