Every now and again someone brings a new idea to the market that irreversibly changes the way we live our lives, and suddenly we wonder how we ever managed before. I’m thinking things like motion pictures, personal computers, and the internet.
Today, I discovered the latest such phenomenon: cureandsimple.com
Essentially, bacon… by post. I mean, you’re just sitting there, in your house and then… Bacon arrives. It just arrives!
Okay, so maybe it’s not quite so life changing – especially for vegetarians or non-pork eaters – but I do like the thought they’ve put in to protecting your bacon from thieves:
Like dogs don’t get excited enough to see the postman already!?
In Sweden a man was prosecuted for walking around naked, indoors, in his home. He was seen by a young woman walking by on the street outside. There was a hedge partly obscuring the view so she had to watch for quite a while to make sure he was really naked and possibly also playing with himself, so that she really had a right to be upset. To prove the offending behaviour, which deeply chocked her, she went back several times to make sure her observations were correct, and also brought her husband along to film the chocking behaviour.
The court asked the woman why she kept watching if the view chocked her. She claimed to have been paralysed by chock. But why return? Because she afterwards began to doubt her observations, so she had to confirm them.
The court dismissed the case because of the distance from the street to the house, the hedge partly obscuring the view, the filmed sequences not proving if the man had done anything more than being naked, like playing with himself, and the fact that she could refrained from watching him, instead of trying to find a better view.
The only remaining question is: what made the prosecutor prosecute? Did he have connections with media, or did he simply see a chance to provide some entertainment for the court?
Back in the day, when I was a hairy-arsed-welder, working for Massey Ferguson, Manchester (or Fermec, as it later became known), producing backhoe-loaders,
a story did the rounds, about a guy making love to his machine. Apparently, he raised the front loader and set the engine to top revs, before rubbing himself up against the vibrating front end. In the picture above, you’ll notice a red bracket fitted to the loader arms. This is a safety device designed to prevent the loader collapsing, when working under the bonnet … or … if you must explore that avenue …when making love to your machine. The lothario in question must have liked living life on the edge, since he didn’t bother with the red safety bracket. He was discovered trapped under the loader’s lateral structure. It was wondered by some, as to whether the machine, at the moment of orgasm, dropped its loader(Nahh they didn’t … I just made that bit up).
However, at the time, we were assured that the tale was true.