Should I be concerned?

Last month I made it out the front door of the house into the yard and I was excited about being there until I realized the front door had locked behind me. Smart thing would have been to lie down on the porch and wait until my husband came home. But instead, I made my way to the basement/garage and walked slowly up a full flight of stairs. My body has spent the past 3 weeks letting me know that I am not strong enough for a flight of stairs and my brain has been hard to find. But that’s not what I’m concerned about.

Yesterday, out of the blue, two facts hit my molasses brain:
1) The house we’ve moved into is on Gangplank Road.
2) I am just “down the street” (okay, 120 miles) from Wock.

Should I be concerned by either of these??

I suppose if anyone on board the Good Ship Scrivener is made to walk the plank, they’ll find me there on my sofa enjoying GR’s recipe for chocolate baguettes (thank you, gr).

  • karen

In a word…yes!..however, as we speak, the Forces of Right and Light, at this very moment, are addressing the Guano Featured scraggy necked chicken problem. Its demise is imminent. Unfortunately, on going pest control i.e. Son/Sons of Wock could prove problematic. [i]Self Restraint[/i], doesnt figure all too prominently, in pigeon lingo! Whereas to excess`, does.

Apropos, Gangplank Rd…well! The mind doth boggle :open_mouth:
Take care Karen

Being a resident of Gangplank Road must surely mean you are now yourself a pirate, and by the Pirate’s Code are quite safe. Of course, since the Code is more a guideline than a rule, you will be happy to know that quality chocolate on toasted baguettes will easily double as irresistible bait for your handy-dandy pigeon trap.

Come to think of it, in any book I have ever read, the lady pirate lounging on the divan nibbling quality chocolate on toasted baguettes unfailingly turns out to be the queen of the pirates. In short, pirate pigeons and dogs alike will tremble at your call.

So, rest easy and rest well. Harrrgh!


P.S. Glad you are enjoying that recipe, and that you are getting about a bit (even if somewhat accidentally).

Rule number 1

Never mess with Southern Women. They are the sweetest and the nicest around. They will literally give the shirt off their back to help you out. If you are digging a hole they would the first to pick up a shovel and help but…

If you ever give a southern woman a reason to spite you there is no place you can hide from their wrath and no amount of time will give you a reprieve. They will get you. They will punish you and if their brothers, uncles, sisters, cousins, grand pappies grand mothers, or church preachers don’t find you first then you are in very deep trouble.

It is very easy to hide a body in the south, the only trouble is digging the hole as I mentioned before southern women have no trouble grabbing that shovel.

My wife one time told me in a sweet voice something that can relate the seriousness of a southern woman’s capacity for retribution.

She told me if I ever hurt her she would simply get me drunk. She would wait until I fell asleep then sew the sheets to the mattress. She would get a hammer and beat me to death. Then she would wrap up what was left in the sheets and feed it to the dogs then what was left of me would be shat back out into the yard and she would use that for fertilizer for her flowers.

In other words Karen you have no fear from me. :slight_smile:

Now Gangplank is not so bad but come summer the humidity will be sweltering since the river is right there by you and the skeeters will be something fierce. (if you are talking about ole gangplank road in New bern)

Also something of interest is Nicholas Sparks (Author of Message in a bottle) which is my wife’s favorite author lives in New Bern so you may run into him or his brother when you are out and about shopping.

And the company I work for has its headquarters in New Bern but I rarely am there so alas my pigeon presence is seldom in New Bern. :slight_smile:

But knowing that you live on Gangplank road only shows that you are a true pirate at heart and the pirate code does apply. As for the stairs, if it isn’t too hot and the skeeters aren’t bad napping on the ole front porch can be nice but alas there is no chocolate nor spirits to drink when you are laying on the porch. :slight_smile:

That’s one really horrible scenario. And brilliant! If I ever write a crime novel, would it be ok to use it? :wink:


Sure :slight_smile: