How to be happy

“How can I be happy”?, one man once asked himself. “If I was rich then I would be happy”, he thought. So he worked like a dog, saved and invested his money and became very rich. But he still wasn’t happy. ”Money, doesn’t make a man happy”, he said. “It’s must be knowledge “. So he studied hard and became a well known professor, but to no avail. “Happiness is not in wealth and knowledge”, he concluded. “The true happiness is when you find God”. So he became religious, prayed every day and lived according to the holy books. But this didn’t make him happy either. “A man can’t be happy. It is impossible”, he confessed to his best friend. “Since everything is meaningless I see no alternative but to kill myself”. “Don’t do that”, his friend said. “I’ve heard of a wise guru in India, which has helped many people. Go and see him”. “Well, I have nothing to loose”, sad the man.
So he took a plane to India, and then a train to the foot of the Himalayas. He then had to climb for several days until he came to the cave where the Guru dwelled. But there were many thousands of people already waiting, so he had to wait in line. After several years it was his turn. So he entered the cave and and saw the Guru sitting in the lotus position. He was gently smiling and birds were flying above his head. A ray of sun was falling on his serene face. “At last, I have come to the right place”, the man thought to himself.

He knelt in front of the guru, and bowed his head. The guru gave him a big smile and asked, “Do you have a question?”. “Yes, how does a man become happy?”, he asked. “That’s very easy”, the guru replied. “Whatever happens to you, you just just say, -This I like!”. The man, jumped on his feet, red in, his fists clenched. “No, no, it can’t be that easy”, he cried. “When you say it, with passion like that”, the guru said, “I must say, that I like it very much!”.

Good story! It’s true, too - so much of what happens to us makes us sad or angry, but it doesn’t have to. Happiness is a state of mind, after all.

I’m afraid, though, that it reminded me of a story I heard once - I hope you don’t mind me posting it here, since it’s also about a man’s search for happiness and a wise guru…

The Tale of the Golden Screw

There was once a boy who had a golden screw instead of a bellybutton. This confused and angered the boy, for he was constantly ridiculed by his peers and was shunned as a freak.

As the boy grew into a young man, the persecution only grew worse. Finally, the young man decided that he would do something about the golden screw once and for all. He traveled many miles to seek the advice of a wise guru, and upon entering the guru’s hut he cried, “Oh, wise guru, I have in place of a bellybutton an accursed golden screw! How can I be rid of it?”

The guru regarded him silently for a moment, and then replied, “My son, there is but one way to rid yourself of the golden screw.”

“Tell me!” cried the young man.

“Tonight there will be a full moon. At midnight you must stand on the peak of the tall mountain you see there outside my window. Then and there will the way be made clear to you.”

Thanking the guru for his help, the young man went to the mountain. It was a long and arduous journey up the mountainside, and took well into the night, but at long last he made it to the peak. He was not a moment too soon, for just as he stood upon the peak the midnight hour came. The light from the full moon shone brightly on the peak, and there, in front of the young man, appeared as if by magic a golden screwdriver.

Slowly, reverently, the young man took the screwdriver and began to remove the hated golden screw. On and on it turned, for it was long and the threads were fine. But finally, with a last twist of the young man’s wrist, the golden screw came loose in his hand.

And then his butt fell off.

The story of my life, that

And you a welder too! See what happens when you go playing around with golden screws? Never 'twould have happened if you’d stuck with a 10swg Vodex! :wink:


You old Bodmin Beast, 10swg was for the kids.

Nothing less than 6 or 4swg, for the Hairsuitum Posterium Weldum

PS My arse wasn`t the only thing that fell off.

Happiness is defined by interpretation. The obstacle is figuring out what language it is written in.

if Hairsuitum Posterium Weldum, is the linguistic barrier, standing twixt you and happiness, then allow me to remove it? It`s Etruscatin, a very old language, that post-dates Etruscan and pre-dates Latin and loosely translated, means Hairyarsed Welder.

I wish you happiness wock,
Take care
Hairsuitum Victicum.

PS if it isn`t the barrier, please forgive the presumption.

I think in the original Persian story by Nabd il Quts it was a golden rivet that was at issue.

Once removed it had to be replaced with a specialist lead plug.

A story for all to muse over. Translated by Sir Richard Burton.