Okay, I’ve spent the last 38 minutes staring at a blank “post a new topic” window, trying to think of something original, clever, and / or funny to say about birthdays. Apparently I’m out of those attributes today.
Still, maybe you can take some comfort that I considered you worth 38 minutes of thought in an otherwise ridiculously hectic day!
You’ve just wasted 1.184210526315789 minutes for every year of numpty’s existence.
Just send one of these: youtube.com/watch?v=s79ZhAzJ1OQ
Happy Birthday numpty And the mother of all hangovers in the morning!!
I’m slightly disappointed Mr Piggy. Not that you spent 38 minutes wasting your day (that makes me quite smiley) but that your attribute counts are so low. A good witticism or 3 from you is worth quite a bit in my book. Quite a bit. And thank you for the thought.
Mr K, I’m not sure you are being quite precise enough. You may need a few more decimal places to been the quality expectations of Mrs Fender. Thanks for the … birds. I sent one to you but the camera wasn’t on.
Mr X, what would the world be without a responsible adult to keep Pigs, nude protestors and shift-8s in line? Could you image the world were the three of us are the mature adults? No one would survive that nightmare. Thank you for the thoughts.
Yes. But I’m a pit of a purest so and Rum2 must be made with Rum1 or you are just … an idiot.
And in my case, you don’t fork with a good Rum1 by turning it into a Rum2. I prefer my Rum1 poured directly into my drinker so I don’t risk contaminating it with anything like melted ice or the inside of a glass. Also reduces waste due to spills and surface tension for the first couple of drinks. And by then you start to pray for spillage so you can be done with the bottle sooner. But the sacrilege of spillage is punishable. Severely punishable. So you don’t spill. You just… keep… drinking.
See rum defined for English-language learners
Examples of rum in a Sentence
They’re a pretty rum lot.
she wears staid business suits, but prefers some quite rum knickers underneath
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More appropriate for numpty … me thinks.
I messed up and started with the ED15 and when I ran out at 12:15 the Capt Morgan private was just … unpalatable.
So far the tally on the carnage…
Wife’s scorn for getting caught riding bicycle while unable to walk.
One set of track clothes ruined due to deciding to run post bender kick off (1.5mi with 3 shots… bad decision. replaced lost shots with 3 more once back at the bottle)
I’m out of ED15
Did I mention the scorn of the Mrs? Because it’s a real thing. Even the dog slinks off when we are in the same room this week.
Lots of neighbors yelling “invite us next year” at random times.
Still a bit hung over. May be that there’s been free booze here at the office the last couple nights and i needed to … reduce the hangover to be social. I’m calling it the same hangover anyway.
Can’t wait for next year! Maybe i’ll go to Stockport and see if Mrs K will let Vic-k come out and play. What say you Mr K?
I’ll take a week. Kind of like delaying the inevitable, but this is one of those rare occasions where “the thought” actually counts more than the execution.