Poker

[KB]

Does anyone know of a good, really, really short introduction to, or explanation of, poker available on the net? Really, something short. The wikipedia page already lost me. To clarify: I’m not really interested in playing poker particularly. But it seems that it is obligatory for every American TV series I watch to include at least one episode in which the lead characters put everything at stake in a game of poker, culminating in a ten-minute denouement of card-playing during which I am staring at the screen in utter confusion wondering how on Earth those two threes have beat that Ace. (Seriously, in the past couple of months alone I’ve seen an old episode of Moonlighting and recent episodes of Castle and Supernatural based around poker games; and last night I sat down to play the video game Red Dead Redemption only to find my cowboy character embroiled in this game I do not comprehend.) It seems a convention of TV to assume that the audience understands poker, so I’m left feeling like an idiot, but without wanting to study the game or play it properly, most of the web pages leave me cold because they seem to be pages long with exhausting lists of hand combinations. I just want to know whether the character in the show I’m watching is winning or losing; I don’t want to have to study a text book…

Thanks and all the best,
Keith

[Jaysen]

No, but I did teach my kids in a few minutes.

Depending on what version you are playing the cards are “delivered” using different methods (5 dealt to you (five card stud/draw), 2 two you + five common (texas hold em’) are the most popular) and betting varies by game. The core of all of them is hand listing. This tells you what beats what. The easiest way to get that is to go buy a pack of cards.

Let me know if you want the kids to teach you how to play. They are cut throat and I won’t play with them anymore.

[monkquixote]

I’ll give it a stab in terms of the psychology, rather than the game mechanics:

Poker is essentially a game of fixed odds that depends on four things for success:
(1) Your understanding of the odds;
(2) Your perception of the other players’ understanding of, or their motivation to act on, those odds;
(3) Luck;
(4) Your ability to pretend you understand nothing of 1,2 or 3 - your ‘poker’ face.

The excitement comes from (a) ‘beating’ the odds, (b) bluffing your opponent, and © the fact that unless you are a suicidal player, when you get down to the final card, or heads-up (one-on-one), then you always have some chance. As most games are played for money, this tends to cloud your understanding of 1,2,3 and enhance your emotion of a,b,c. Which is why 4 matters so much.

All poker games go in rounds, which encourages dramatic tension (and more betting), as the ‘true’ odds will not be revealed until all the communal cards or cards in your hand are dealt. Without this element, the game would be much more predictable, and wouldn’t allow your acting skills to figure.

The more communal cards are used, the more people you can put around a table (and the bigger the pots get - both of which tends to favour either very aggressive or very defensive play).

It is typical for the end of a hand to be played out by two players, although not unusual for it to be three. It is very rare that four or more sensible players will get into a situation where they are all betting on different outcomes.

Hand preference order - google an image is easier than re-typing - eg

I could explain it even more opaquely if you want.

[DMJ]

Hey Keith,

We’re playing poker next time I’m over! (That and going surfing.) For much higher odds than the weeks spent sitting in a caravan during rainy afternoons in Wales. I know your “tells” already.

Dee-Jay

[AmberV]

The only thing I know about poker is that where I lived, six or seven years ago, the upstairs neighbours would play every Friday night, and then afterwards there would be bellowing, fist fights, the ritual throwing about of heavy furniture, and then someone, for hours later, wild-eyed and with obsessive compulsive intent, running a vacuum cleaner ferociously over the entire apartment, being sure to get the fibres along the wall boards by using the technique of ramming the cleaner with the greatest possible amount of physical force into the walls.

Then they would copulate with vigour, and finally go to sleep.

[Wock]

The two most “popular” forms of Poker are:

5 card draw
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Five-card_draw

or
essortment.com/hobbies/carddrawpoke_tvss.htm

This is the common poker “variant” seen in movie scenes and poker games, books and like at someone’s house.

And the “Texas Hold’em” which is most common in Casinos
boardgames.about.com/cs/poker/a/texas_rules.htm
poker.about.com/od/poker101/ht/holdem101.htm

[Jaysen]

@AmberV

The only thing I know about poker is that where I lived, six or seven years ago, the upstairs neighbours would play every Friday night, and then afterword there would be bellowing, fist fights, the ritual throwing about of heavy furniture, and then someone, for hours later, wild-eyed and with obsessive compulsive intent, running a vacuum cleaner ferociously over the entire apartment, being sure to get the fibres along the wall boards by using the technique of ramming the cleaner with the greatest possible amount of physical force into the walls.

Then they would copulate with vigour, and finally go to sleep.

This is the winner. What else do you need to know; After poker you “copulate with vigour”.

Note to self, never play poker with vic-k’s “vicar” persona. That could be very … upsetting.

[Wock]

And I always was told most establishments offer “Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.”

[PJS]

Success in poker – as in baking, politics, lock-picking, and love – frequently depends upon one other factor: patience. Fifty years ago and more, I won a fair amount playing poker in the Army, and all because of patience. (Indirectly, of course. Everyone at the table drank, and being patient meant waiting until several others had progressed to alcoholic over-confidence or under-awareness.)

ps

[Wock]

And yet not a single mention of the most popular form of drunken poker!

[size=200]STRIP POKER![/size]

Why you should never wear “ugly drawers” to parties…

[howarth]

A while back, I posted this note:

My favorite analogy for story-telling is poker. There are two principal varieties, stud and draw. In stud, the cards are face-down. You roll a card and place a bet. Stud is life: you never know what’s coming up, and you bet on whatever is showing. Draw poker is different: you are dealt a hand, study the cards, throw in some rejects, take new cards…and then proceed to play them out in a sequence that will entice, entrap, or intimidate your opponents. Enticement is the best way to win a pot, if you have the best cards. And that is the essence of good story-telling.

The iPad abounds with poker apps. Don’t let Mom or the kids learn before you!