Hi,
I’d like to have a tool in scrivener to find the sentences in my text that are longer than n words.
I’m a nerd writing a howto book. From time to time my sentences are too complicated 
Thanks,
Gerd
I could never bring myself to introduce such a tool, I’m afraid, as I am–unfashionable as it may be–one of those who can appreciate long sentences; indeed, I recently bought a course from The Teaching Company all about sentence structure, the teacher of whom lamented the modern dislike of long sentences, instead imploring his listeners to embrace sentence structure and to concentrate on a sentence’s flow over its length (I still have some work to do ).
Whenever I think a sentence is too long, I think of Kafka - he knew how to stretch a line better than any other author I can recall. Once I have regained perspective, I then ask if the sentence flows well and communicates clearly. The answer to that question usually results in changing the sentence but sometimes, just sometimes, the rhythm and content need the length and it’s a joy to wallow in that logorrheic goodness.
Amen.
A neat example, though possibly flawed, inasmuch as a thoroughgoing and pure-hearted long sentence aficionado might well blanch at being asked so casually to accept, as evidence that one truly belongs to the clan, a full-stop presentation – statement or claim, question or accusation – which relied for its continuation from initial capital letter all the way to aforesaid first full stop upon an interposed semicolon, a perfectly respectable and useful instrument, Mr. Vonnegut’s strictures notwithstanding, which, however, one might argue (although I do not; I merely offer the possibility) represents a de facto full stop and thereby invalidates any claim to single sentenceness.
(I really need to get out of the house more often.)
ps
There’s far too much reliance on computer-based writing assistance. It’s a detriment to good writing, in my opinion. That, coming from the man whose spell checker gets a constant workout. One can write too many short sentences. That’s not always a good thing. If you think a conjunction or two would improve this post, then you’re fine without such tools. If not, then read more. Writing more would be a good idea too. Have faith in your own mind’s ability to spot bad sentences.
Now get off my lawn, youngster!
Damned kids these days.
I know. T’was a cheat. Agreed!
Marcel slowly raised his eyes, tired and bloodshot as they were, as when the tiny specks of vermillion beetroot (picked only that morning in the verdant fields next to the river that flowed slowly, petulant as the lips of the girl to whom one has given a franc for a kiss behind the old florist’s shop on the Champs Elysée on the way home from an evening at the Verdurins’ in which Mme Verdurin has once again slighted one’s acquaintances from a higher social sphere whom one has chanced not to mention, but whom she had discovered from some unknown source, a cousin, perhaps, or even the fellow who turns the pages of the score when the pianist plays that fragment from that sonata which tears and yet ennobles one’s soul, and after the kiss has been granted refused to give her the franc, knowing that this was a low act, yet feeling nonetheless that one was justified as the kiss had failed to bring back the memory of that first kiss in the carriage on the night that Odette had first agreed to one’s adjusting her corsage, alongside the way that ran past Swann’s house from our house in Combray) prick the soft mayonnaise, creamy as the fresh milk in the bowl of the cat that sits at the feet of the Whore of Babylon receiving the Tax Inspectors in Botticelli’s masterpiece, with tiny specks of fire that sear and uplift and depress; raised his eyes, read the last few posts and sighed: “Lightweights.”
From my collection of great examples:
Amateurs! Patent lawyers know how to right long sentences. A patent is a series of claims with each claim required to be a single sentence. I’ve heard that some run to 3000 words. Here’s a claim from one of my patents (written by a patent attorney, not me), only 544 words:
- In a system having a host processor coupled to a plurality of controllers, said plurality of controllers including at least an addressed controller and a partner controller in communication with said addressed controller, a method of reading a controller signature identifying controller characteristics of said addressed controller and said partner controller, said method comprising steps of:
issuing a read signature command by a host to read controller signature data stored in a memory of an addressed controller, said controller signature data comprising a failed bit, a valid bit, a which bit, and a predetermined signature uniquely identifying at least one of said addressed controller and said partner controller;
receiving said read signature command by the addressed controller or by a partner controller to said addressed controller;
determining if either of the addressed controller or the partner controller of the addressed controller is in a failed state;
determining whether said read controller signature data is valid or invalid;
if said controller signature data is determined to be invalid, then clearing said which bit in said signature data, and sending said read controller signature data to said host; and
if said read controller signature data is determined to be valid, then sending either addressed controller signature data stored in said addressed controller, partner controller signature data stored in said addressed controller, addressed controller signature data stored in said partner controller, or said partner controller signature data stored in said partner controller,
if said read controller signature data is determined to be valid, then said controller signature data that is sent to said host is further determined by determining if the controller from which this controller signature data is being read is responding to the read signature command on behalf of itself or on behalf of its failed partner controller;
if said controller is responding to the read signature command on behalf of its failed partner controller, then determining if it is the partner’s signature data that is being requested; and if it is the partner’s signature that is being requested, setting the which controller bit, retrieving the addressed controller signature data from the addressed controllers signature data memory location, and sending said retrieved addressed controller’s signature data to the host; else if it is not the partner’s signature data that is being requested then clearing the which controller bit, retrieving said partner controller signature data from the partners signature data memory location, and sending said retrieved partner signature data to said host; said addressed controller’s signature data and said partner signature data correspondence being reversed when said controller is responding on behalf of its failed partner controller; and
if said controller is responding on behalf of itself, then determining if it is the partner’s signature data that is being requested; and if it is the partner’s signature data that is being requested, setting the which controller bit, retrieving the partner’s signature data from the partner signature data memory location of the controller, and sending said retrieved partner signature data to said host; but, if it is not the partner’s signature data that is being requested, clearing the which controller bit, retrieving the addressed controller’s signature data from said addressed controller’s signature data memory location, and sending said retrieved addressed controller signature data to said host.
Love it! Can you provide a reference? I’d love to use it with my students.
Yes, but is it still English or has it become that bane of clarity, the bastard-child of politics and law, Legalese?
I think I found it in a small book titled “100 ways to improve your writing”, by said Gary Provost.
Actually, if you read this aloud properly it doesn’t have the effect the writer intends since several of his 5 word sentences are actually 10/15 word sentences poorly punctuated. You need to deliberately pause. At the end of each. Five word grouping in order. To make his point.
Read it again:
This sentence has five words.
Here are five more words.
Five-word sentences are fine, but several together become monotonous.
Listen to what is happening: the writing is getting boring, the sound of it drones.
I agree whole heartedly with the point Mr Provost was making. I just think his example needs work.
The RED LION protest flotilla exits the Mersey estuary and enters the turbulent waters of the Irish Sea and sets a course for the mouth of the Thames estuary, thence the House of Commons and Parliament.
“KRAKEN! FIVE LEAGUES ASTERN! ’N’ GAININ’!”
“Kraken? Wot th’ f…? Wassa kraken?”
“Don’t know. Ask Vic.”
“Vic! Wossa kraken?!”
Vic-k, whose mind’s default setting is, ‘toying with abstractions’, needs a few moments of reorientation, in order to afford this strident enquiry due diligence . “Errm…sorry. What w’s the question, agin?”
“Wassa kraken?”
“Err…tch!..err, how best t’ describe…err…yeah…y’ know the more than amply proportioned, and usually scantily clad landlady at the ‘Horse&Farrier’ hostelry, at t’far end of the village…the one with the big brown ‘come-to-bed eyes and the husky/breathy voice, that causes a blanketing silence to descend over the room, whenever, in answer to her solicitation of a new and unsuspecting male customer, as to, ‘What would you like… my darlin?’, he answers,
‘A-a-a p-pint of G-guinness please.” just like the lamb to the slaughter that he unwittingly is…as she…
“KRAKEN! THREE LEAGUES ASTERN, ’N’ GAINING!!”
“…steps back from the bar top and bends forward, apparently (to the innocent lamb (but not to the knowing onlookers seated around the bar)), seeking something under the bar, which in reality is naught but a sadistic bout of ‘cleavage charm flaunting’, before she retrieves a straight sided pint glass with her left hand and holds it under the Guinness tap, whilst taking hold of the base of the Guinness pump handle with her right, before slowly sliding that hand up the shaft of the ebony coloured, brass tipped handle, as far as its bulbous tip, and drawing the phallus shaped lever back down towards her, to it furthest most horizontal position; a vision which only the truly dimwitted or myopic could possibly fail to regard as symbolic of rampant erectile tissue, but, even with the process repeated time and again until the the glass was full to overflowing, with thick creamy, slightly off-white foam cascading over her fingers…not one murmur was there from the assembled company of silent voyeurs, who were more than content to sit at their tables and watch this oft played-out mini-drama unfold…no, not one single murmur was there…sniggers?..oh…there‘re always plenty of those, especially…
KRAKEN!! ONE ’N’ALF LEAGUES ASTERN, “N” GAINING!.. F’KIN’ FAST!
…as she places the foam drenched glass on to the bar in front of ‘the lamb’, and raises her hand to her mouth, flicking her tongue tantalisingly at some of the Guinness foam thereon, before saying, “Three pound fifty, my love”, which, incidentally, invariably results in a substantial tip for our heroine, as now, with Lamb tendering a five pound note, whilst beseeching her to keep the change, which she acknowledges with a breathy, “Thank you, sweetheart”, as she conceals the legal tender amongst the curves and undulations of her décolletage, thereby, causing inestimable perturbation to his emotional equilibrium, along with other not too easily camouflaged changes to his physical state, indeed, the very same changes, concerning which, many wagers were now taking place betwixt various members of the voyeuristic clientele sat at their respective tables surrounding the hapless lamb, as his attempt at taking possession of his glass of Guinness is thwarted by the landlady Susanna, effecting a revealing pose, as she leans across the bar and takes hold of his questing hand in her own Ebony Elixir anointed hand, gently and rhythmically squeezing it as she taps the side of the glass of Guinness with the forefinger of her other hand, and cruelly diverts his gaze thereto, away from her cleavage, as she point out to him that the Guinness in its present state of chaos and turbulence, evident through the side of the glass, is as close an approximation as he is ever likely to see of the state of the Universe, not long after the Big Bang, and he should wait a while for a less turbulent state to prevail before moving his Guinness, at which time, she assures him, ‘I will top you up”, after which she turns away and attends for a few moments, to certain tasks behind the bar, which to the casual observer, may appear to be performed with an inordinate amount of revealing bending and stretching."
"Well, me hearties, that lovely lassie is…a little… cracker.”
KRAKEN OFF THE STARBOARD B…AAARRRGGGHHH!!!
Thanks. Found the quote on his website (which will do for now since I can attribute it to the original author without complication) but will look out for his book.
Quibbling? I think his sentences work as is (with the possible exception of starting a sentence with “but”), although they are definitely improved by the use of commas and colons. To me, this proves his point.
Bravo! 
What?
[size=85](I struggled with that sentence insofar as I prefer, whenever possible, to maintain a level of politeness befitting an English education, thus my first inclination was to raise a countering query with ‘pardon’ but, on reflection, I decided on 'what’ as I considered it of greater import to present a strident, laconic response in the face of such blatant and unfettered verbosity.)[/size]
Good lawd Master Bert, that looks awfully like something that dreadful dominatrix woman, Belinda Balloons, would be involved in. There’s enough of that filth on the lower decks, without afording it legitimacy, by importing it onto these loftier realms…home to the erudite and intelligent.
Fluff
Truth will out, eh? You’re assessment is, sadly, bang on target, you obnoxious old fur ball. I’ll toddle back down to the bilges where I belong…
Ho hum… 