OK Cross! Y’ think y’re gerrin away with it … but y’re not! You’ll ‘ave t’ do berra than just a little piccy on a wall full o’ dead ‘ns. If y’ don’t deliver soon, you could end up wi’ a shit load o’ Scriv miscreants an’ ner’do 'ells under your bed!!
So!! Where is she, Cross? Where the f*** is Alice?!!!
Probably charming audiences at the Bristol Old Vic.
Feck Bristol’s Old Vic!!! Worrabout Stockport’s old Vic!!!
Hmmm…hasn’t Stockport’s old Vic already got hisself an international coterie of ardent admirers?
Sorry I missed this, Vic. But keep your eyes peeled.
(Or she might peel them for you.)
Listen y’ wassack!! If y’re saying all we’re gonna get, is the gorgeous arse end of her disappearing through the the auto-doors of Wandsworth’s ALDI store, “And that’s y’ lot!”, then you got friggin big problems, Cross!! BIG 'N’s!!. It won’t be just the NSA-FBI-GCHQ crawling all over y’r ‘ard drive, pal!! Don’t be surprised if y’ keyboard turns to putty, or y’ pinkies start going through y’r touch screens, leaving them covered with flesh eating gunge! If you think Ken’s fingers were in a bad way, y’d berra think again!
Y’r borrowed times runnin’ out, Cross… fast!
Best wishes
Vic
Oh please, please, Master Neil, bring Miss Alice back soon. I’m sharing a Writer’s-room with a very angry Velociraptor!!
Fluff
Vic can sleep at ease in his bed.
But that’s as much as I can say. The exact nature of Alice’s movements must remain a mystery, until Alice says otherwise… or I risk paying a most terrible price.
Y’re pushin’ it Pal… y’re pushin it!!
Vic, you might want to check out the end of the Ep 4 trailer…
Felling a tree all day yesterday (don’t ask!), so missed the lad last night, but will catch him this afternoon, garden permitting. I’ll be watching whilst making a waxen figure resembling a certain feckless, Customer Care abandoning, so called crime writer. I’ll have to hand, a box of over a hundred pins and a goodly supply of scalpel blades, for fine detail work on aforementioned wax figure. If you think I’m kiddin’ y’, check out below. Voodoo is strong badarsed juju!
I’m warning you Cross, if it’s just the backside of Alice disappearing through a door…you’re for it!.. truly… y’re for it!!
DO TAKE CARE
Vic
Looks like y’ve survived this time, pal… but it was a skin of the teeth scenario.
Anyway:
youtube.com/watch?v=b2WzocbSd2w
Not a word about poor Ripley I see, Vic? Stockport hotrod or not, you stand accused of blatant sexism matey.
Listen!.. y’ Celtic croaker. wot the ‘ell d’ y’ expect from a sicko like Cross, Bill&Ben!
Ripley is a character in a friggin telly series! Shit 'appens… dunnit… eh? Gerroverit! But Alice… Alice, she’s a… goddess. A gorgeous, beautiful wicked Goddess. A tauntress… a beguiling tauntress… a beautiful temptress. She trifles, pitilessly, with brave, real men’s emotions. A Hellen of Troy… a million times over. I could compare her to a summer day… a day of pending thunder storms, and their unleashing of immeasurable pent up powerful lust fuelled passion…
Ripley? Oh yeah. Ah well, c’est la vie…eh?
Roll on next Tus. 9pm. Seems like a month away!
Vic
DAMMIT. I had intended to code into Scrivener a failsafe that would completely eat Neil’s script if he tried to do anything bad to Ripley, but I forgot. As a result, I found myself shouting at the screen on Tuesday night. Cross shall not be forgiven. I shall get my revenge in code somehow…
I very nearly pointed croaker in your direction, cos I know you have issues with Cross, Kev
But then I thought, nahh, we don’t really near a load of old melodramatic carrying on… d’ we?
Vic
No New Zealand localisation…ever! That’ll show 'em Keith. Guilt by association. I mean, one has to draw the line somewhere, eh?
Keith
I only killed him BECAUSE I KNEW YOU DIDN’T WANT ME TO. So actually, it’s your fault.
I hope you can live with that. I’m not sure I could.
Oh! Young Master Kevin,
Do we really need this Cross person aboard The Good Ship. Surely, we’d all be safer in our beds and baskets, if he were put to ‘THE PLANK’!!! Only the sharks and barracudas will be at risk then.
Very wary Fluff
Did you guys know you can read the first six scripts from the first series of Luther on the BBC website?
bbc.co.uk/writersroom/scripts/luther-s1-ep1
They make for a great read and prove Neil’s original intention was to write a Sci Fi series.